Not much to say other than...cute kids!
Thursday, June 5, 2008
A day we remember
I started this blog as a way for me to document my kids’ day-to-day activities so that family and friends stayed in the loop. Now I view it with that purpose as well as a journal for my children to have when they are older and interested in what their childhood and our family life were like. I print off the text and pictures and keep a 3-ring binder of my blog posts. (Actually, Brianna, our nanny does it for me.) So it is with the last intent that I am writing this post. This post makes me a little sad but sometimes it’s better to share and get it out versus keep it to yourself.
Today is June 5, 2008. 3 years ago, I miscarried our second baby. The story is as follows. I was approximately 8 weeks pregnant and scheduled to have my first ultrasound at the doctor’s office on June 7, 2005. Obviously with the crazy pregnancy with Brock, they wanted to see me as early as possible. We had known I was pregnant for about 3 weeks. June 5, 2005 was a Sunday. I went to bed at a normal time but woke up with a HORRIBLE dream at around 1 am. I dreamt that I was at my appointment for my ultrasound. I was taken to an exam room facing a specific direction. (I’ve been in each of their 8 exam rooms before – they are not all the same.) I was seen initially by someone wearing a white lab coat, which is not common practice at the office. They told me that Dr. Saffer had been called out of the office on an emergency and that Dr. Marcrander would be conducting my ultrasound. (there are 3 different doctors at this office.) Dr. Marcrander comes in shortly after that and places the ultrasound machine near my head on the right side. She is pregnant in my dream. She then begins her exam and tells me that the baby looks starchy and that I was going to miscarry in the next week or so. She said not to worry, that I would be ok. I began crying in my dream and then woke up, hysterically crying in my bed.
I could not get this dream out of my head. I was very upset and on the day of my scheduled ultrasound, I was having difficulty breathing. I was sure that my dream was correct. I knew that this baby was gone. My mom was visiting us and wanted to join me at the appointment. I had told her about my dream but being a good mom, she just kept saying not to worry and that maybe I was just panicking because of Brock’s unplanned arrival. So off we head to my afternoon appointment. I am taken to an exam room that looks exactly like my dream exam room. Mona, the nurse practioner wearing a white lab coat, takes my medical history and performs just a basic exam. As she is leaving she tells me that Dr. Saffer was called out of the office on an emergency and that Dr. Marcrander will be conducting my ultrasound. I almost screamed. I grabbed her hand and said that this couldn’t happen because if Dr. Marcrander comes in, she is going to tell me that my baby died. Mona looks at me with the oddest look on her face and I told her my dream. I was very insistent that I knew what was going to happen. Especially since so far, the dream was becoming reality. Apparently, Mona leaves the room and talks with Dr. Marcrander about my dream and that I am extremely agitated. My mom makes it into the room where I tell her that my dream is coming true. Dr. Marcrander comes in very lively and tries to be upbeat with me. She tells me that she has heard about my dream. I told her about it and then mentioned to her that she was pregnant in my dream. She told me, well I hope you are wrong since I just had a baby 2 months ago. (I had no idea she was even pregnant.) Anyway, she placed the ultrasound machine near my head on my right side, just like my dream. She starts the exam and I can tell that there is no heartbeat and that the baby didn’t look like how Brock looked. Dr. Marcrander said that I was right and that the baby was gone and she said that the baby stopped growing a couple of days ago. I said I know, it was Sunday June 5th. I was extremely upset. My mom went into the outer office and overhead Dr. Marcrander and Mona discussing how I was right and that they had the chills from my appointment. I then had to schedule my D&C for later in the week. When I went into the operating room for the surgery, Dr. Saffer and I were talking. I asked if he heard about my dream about the miscarriage. He said, oh you are the patient. Dr. Marcrander took 3 pregnancy tests after your visit because of how convincing your dream was. Turns out she wasn’t pregnant.
So, that’s what today is for our family. I am crying a little because of a dream lost. And I am in no way equating my miscarriage with the loss of a child. They are very different and I wouldn’t wish either loss on my worst enemy. It happens to be an event in our lives that Steve and I share and remember. It affected our family and it has changed it in other ways. Without this miscarriage, we would not have Lynzy. For that I know that the plans have worked out exactly as they should have.
Today is June 5, 2008. 3 years ago, I miscarried our second baby. The story is as follows. I was approximately 8 weeks pregnant and scheduled to have my first ultrasound at the doctor’s office on June 7, 2005. Obviously with the crazy pregnancy with Brock, they wanted to see me as early as possible. We had known I was pregnant for about 3 weeks. June 5, 2005 was a Sunday. I went to bed at a normal time but woke up with a HORRIBLE dream at around 1 am. I dreamt that I was at my appointment for my ultrasound. I was taken to an exam room facing a specific direction. (I’ve been in each of their 8 exam rooms before – they are not all the same.) I was seen initially by someone wearing a white lab coat, which is not common practice at the office. They told me that Dr. Saffer had been called out of the office on an emergency and that Dr. Marcrander would be conducting my ultrasound. (there are 3 different doctors at this office.) Dr. Marcrander comes in shortly after that and places the ultrasound machine near my head on the right side. She is pregnant in my dream. She then begins her exam and tells me that the baby looks starchy and that I was going to miscarry in the next week or so. She said not to worry, that I would be ok. I began crying in my dream and then woke up, hysterically crying in my bed.
I could not get this dream out of my head. I was very upset and on the day of my scheduled ultrasound, I was having difficulty breathing. I was sure that my dream was correct. I knew that this baby was gone. My mom was visiting us and wanted to join me at the appointment. I had told her about my dream but being a good mom, she just kept saying not to worry and that maybe I was just panicking because of Brock’s unplanned arrival. So off we head to my afternoon appointment. I am taken to an exam room that looks exactly like my dream exam room. Mona, the nurse practioner wearing a white lab coat, takes my medical history and performs just a basic exam. As she is leaving she tells me that Dr. Saffer was called out of the office on an emergency and that Dr. Marcrander will be conducting my ultrasound. I almost screamed. I grabbed her hand and said that this couldn’t happen because if Dr. Marcrander comes in, she is going to tell me that my baby died. Mona looks at me with the oddest look on her face and I told her my dream. I was very insistent that I knew what was going to happen. Especially since so far, the dream was becoming reality. Apparently, Mona leaves the room and talks with Dr. Marcrander about my dream and that I am extremely agitated. My mom makes it into the room where I tell her that my dream is coming true. Dr. Marcrander comes in very lively and tries to be upbeat with me. She tells me that she has heard about my dream. I told her about it and then mentioned to her that she was pregnant in my dream. She told me, well I hope you are wrong since I just had a baby 2 months ago. (I had no idea she was even pregnant.) Anyway, she placed the ultrasound machine near my head on my right side, just like my dream. She starts the exam and I can tell that there is no heartbeat and that the baby didn’t look like how Brock looked. Dr. Marcrander said that I was right and that the baby was gone and she said that the baby stopped growing a couple of days ago. I said I know, it was Sunday June 5th. I was extremely upset. My mom went into the outer office and overhead Dr. Marcrander and Mona discussing how I was right and that they had the chills from my appointment. I then had to schedule my D&C for later in the week. When I went into the operating room for the surgery, Dr. Saffer and I were talking. I asked if he heard about my dream about the miscarriage. He said, oh you are the patient. Dr. Marcrander took 3 pregnancy tests after your visit because of how convincing your dream was. Turns out she wasn’t pregnant.
So, that’s what today is for our family. I am crying a little because of a dream lost. And I am in no way equating my miscarriage with the loss of a child. They are very different and I wouldn’t wish either loss on my worst enemy. It happens to be an event in our lives that Steve and I share and remember. It affected our family and it has changed it in other ways. Without this miscarriage, we would not have Lynzy. For that I know that the plans have worked out exactly as they should have.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Funny story
So this story might be classified as "too much information" but it had me laughing for hours and I've been telling the story to all those that call our house. Last week, Brock and Lynzy were jumping in Lynzy's crib. Brock was not wearing clothes. He was coming out of the crib and not to give to much detail, but he injured his private. Not bad, just a little tear. Can't put a bandaid on it or anything. So, I had him take a warm bath so at least it was clean and of course, he had to show Daddy the boo-boo on his pee-pee.
Later that day, Brianna, our nanny came over to help me with some Steve's Plumbing work. Brock was sitting next to her and asked her if she wanted to see his pee-pee. I cracked up because I knew exactly what he was getting at. She looked at him laughing and said, no that's ok. I then told her why he was asking her that. Then later, Brock was on the couch and he turned to us (Brianna, Daddy & me) and announced, "My pee-pee is BIG!" Which made us all laugh. He was trying to say that the boo-boo was big. I had to tell him on Monday, not to show his boo-boo to anyone at preschool because it wasn't something they wanted to see. It was all so innocent and adorable. Brock makes me laugh.
Later that day, Brianna, our nanny came over to help me with some Steve's Plumbing work. Brock was sitting next to her and asked her if she wanted to see his pee-pee. I cracked up because I knew exactly what he was getting at. She looked at him laughing and said, no that's ok. I then told her why he was asking her that. Then later, Brock was on the couch and he turned to us (Brianna, Daddy & me) and announced, "My pee-pee is BIG!" Which made us all laugh. He was trying to say that the boo-boo was big. I had to tell him on Monday, not to show his boo-boo to anyone at preschool because it wasn't something they wanted to see. It was all so innocent and adorable. Brock makes me laugh.
Muffins with Mom
Brock's preschool hosts a Mother's Day celebration the week prior to Mother's Day. Brock served me muffins and juice and gave me a candle with candle holder and his handprint on a doily. This is a picture of us from that day. I think we look great. Our eyes are open and we are both smiling. Sometimes that is hard to do.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Quick Visit
My mom came to visit for the day last week. She's a busy retiree so when SW has cheap flights, she comes on an early flight and leaves after dinner. I wish we lived closer together. I would love to call my mom up and say..hey let's go to the mall or lunch or just hang out. I love her. And my kids adore her. They get very excited when Grandma is on the phone and even more excited when she is here. Unfortunately, this visit my mom went home with an injury. I can't get the pictures to upload but it was during our walk around the neighborhood and my mom was pushing my version of a double stroller. Lynzy in the stroller seat, Brock on the handle bars. This set up isn't in the instructions so it's safe right? So, anyway, the stroller takes a dive and my mom, Brock & Lynzy go down. My mom sinks to her knees saying "What the *ell just happened?" about 30 times, Lynzy keeps saying "Help me Mommy." and Brock just cries. We still aren't sure what happened but Mom went home with bleeding knuckles (cut down many layers of skin) and black and blue fingers. We joked about how my dad was going to put Iodine on it the minute she got home. Iodine BURNS!! It was my dad's cureall for all of our childhood scrapes. Anyway, my dad did hit her up with Iodine and she has been in some pain but at least nothing was broken. Sorry Mom. We hope you come back.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Random happenings
No pics to go with this post. Just want to write some stories.
About a week ago, Brock was giving Lynzy a hug good night and was accidentally pushing her down. I bent over the two of them to make sure no one would fall. Brock suddenly stood up and head butted me in the mouth. I went down like a ton of bricks. I was hurting something fierce and all I heard was "Mommy, you hurt me." My lip was busted open on the inside and was bleeding a lot. I am lucky that I didn't break a tooth or that my injuries didn't require sutures. It was PAINFUL!! I do not know how boxers can handle getting beat up. It has healed now but still has some lingering pain. Brock's head is fine by the way.
Lynzy is an amazing little girl. She is 21 months old and FEISTY. Here are the words that currently describe her personality and moods: Diva, independent, stubborn, strong-willed, determined, older beyond her years, pain in the rear. The most common phrase she says to me in the last week is "I DO IT!" at the top of her lungs for everything I am trying to help her with. Getting dressed, eating food, buckling her in the stroller/high chair/car seat, taking a bath, getting a drink/food, putting on her shoes, diaper changing, wiping her hands/face and the list goes on. Her other favorite phrase is "I HAVE IT!" This is a winner with her brothers (not really) I just keep reminding myself that this phase will pass, I just hope for sooner rather than later.
Brock is such a sweet little boy. He has such empathy and genuine concern for others. When I busted my lip, he stroked my hair and rubbed my back to make me feel better. In fact, he did that today when I woke up feeling like I had been beaten up by 3 gorillas. (I think I have developed severe allergies or a sinus infection.) Anyway, his newest thing is that when one of us (Daddy, Wesley or I) do something for him or with him or anything nice that he benefits from, he says "I'm going to snuggle with you." That's his way of repaying us for our good deed. Also, he is very particular about whom he sits next to. And it depends on his feeling of happiness with you. We play musical chairs at times.
About a week ago, Brock was giving Lynzy a hug good night and was accidentally pushing her down. I bent over the two of them to make sure no one would fall. Brock suddenly stood up and head butted me in the mouth. I went down like a ton of bricks. I was hurting something fierce and all I heard was "Mommy, you hurt me." My lip was busted open on the inside and was bleeding a lot. I am lucky that I didn't break a tooth or that my injuries didn't require sutures. It was PAINFUL!! I do not know how boxers can handle getting beat up. It has healed now but still has some lingering pain. Brock's head is fine by the way.
Lynzy is an amazing little girl. She is 21 months old and FEISTY. Here are the words that currently describe her personality and moods: Diva, independent, stubborn, strong-willed, determined, older beyond her years, pain in the rear. The most common phrase she says to me in the last week is "I DO IT!" at the top of her lungs for everything I am trying to help her with. Getting dressed, eating food, buckling her in the stroller/high chair/car seat, taking a bath, getting a drink/food, putting on her shoes, diaper changing, wiping her hands/face and the list goes on. Her other favorite phrase is "I HAVE IT!" This is a winner with her brothers (not really) I just keep reminding myself that this phase will pass, I just hope for sooner rather than later.
Brock is such a sweet little boy. He has such empathy and genuine concern for others. When I busted my lip, he stroked my hair and rubbed my back to make me feel better. In fact, he did that today when I woke up feeling like I had been beaten up by 3 gorillas. (I think I have developed severe allergies or a sinus infection.) Anyway, his newest thing is that when one of us (Daddy, Wesley or I) do something for him or with him or anything nice that he benefits from, he says "I'm going to snuggle with you." That's his way of repaying us for our good deed. Also, he is very particular about whom he sits next to. And it depends on his feeling of happiness with you. We play musical chairs at times.
Another attempt at dressing
It might just be me that thinks these are funny posts but since it's my blog, I get to document anything I want. The top of his shorts is actually the bottom of one of the legs. His left leg is coming out of the top of the shorts and the right leg is in the left leg hole. Love my little man.
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